Monday, May 6, 2013

Inner Demons


"There is a beast in each of us, and none of us can ever say we would never be guilty of such evil." ~ Desmond Tutu

Back to reading at a never-ending pace tonight, I came across this quote and it stopped me for a few minutes. We all would like to say that we are not capable of doing an act of evil but we can be. I remember an event that brought out the mother bear in me and I saw this potential arise within me. I have never forgotten the rage and urge to protect that I felt. It is a humbling thing.

However, I do not think I could repeat the act many times. I doubt that violence could bring me joy or pleasure. Reading the victim and perpetrator stories of apartheid is draining emotionally. I am surprised, but grateful that I am not having endless nightmares since the last thing I do is read. Perhaps the balance of also doing the Examen and Voskamp's Joy Dare balance out the emotions.

Do not feed the beast. Acknowledge it and keep a watchful eye on it. Starving it might defeat it. Look instead at what will nourish hope and love.

peace,

Suzanne

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