Fearless at Fifty?

“Take heart, it is I; do not be afraid.” ~ Jesus in the Gospel of Mark, Chapter 6.

Fear is a funny emotion. I hate the way it paralyzes a person. I spent a year walking through my fears when I turned 40. I decided to do 40 new things that year. Little did I know that one of the first events would make my heart race and induce a wee bit of a panic attack. I took a kayaking course and in the first class we had to do a wet exit—which meant being underwater in an upside down kayak and exiting it successfully. Yeah, right. My fear of water was never so evident as at the moment the instructor asked me to do that. I did it though and each time thereafter I had to give myself a pep talk but I did manage to do it every time I needed to.

When I volunteered with Habitat for Humanity, I encountered my fear of heights. Each year, I climbed a little higher up a house until I finally stood on the rooftop, shingling. Getting off that roof was much more difficult than getting on it. I was so freaked out, I could not move. I got down though. There have been copious times when fear has attempted to prevent me from doing what I wanted to do. I have learned though that fear cannot win. The passage from Mark is a favourite of mine. Take heart. Jesus is with me. Do not be afraid.

Many of us struggle with ours fears and I am saddened by how it prevents us from moving into an amazing experience. If I had walked away from that kayaking lesson that day, I would never have discovered an activity that I grew to love deeply. I raved about it to a friend and colleague and she went on to become an avid paddler. If fear had stopped me, that would have lead to my friend and colleague also not learning to kayak which would have lead to her friend doing the same. Fear has a chain reaction. It prevents people from living fully.

I try to walk through my fears because I do not want to live half a life. I want to live as fully as possible and celebrate each gift that is presented as a new adventure. As I approach 50, I hope that fears have less control over me. Take heart; do not be afraid. Nothing we ever do is a solo venture.

Peace,

Suzanne