“Christ was not crucified on a cathedral altar between two candles but on a garbage dump between two criminals.” ~ Prison Ministry Brochure
Tonight I gave a talk at the Way of the Cross on the Prison Ministry that my church has been doing over the years. Here is part of what I said:
When preparing for this talk in the context of doing the Way of the Cross, I could not help but think of the slogan printed on the prison ministry brochure:
Christ was not crucified on a cathedral altar between two candles but on a garbage dump between two criminals.
The cross is a symbol of our faith. It points to hope, an assurance of God’s love and mercy, and proof of forgiveness. As Jesus is crucified, he is placed between two criminals. In Matthew’s Gospel, both men revile him. In Luke’s Gospel account, we see where one is repentant and open to Christ and the other hurls abuse at Him. The repentant one takes responsibility for what he has done and says they deserve to be there but Jesus does not. Sometimes in this ministry we encounter both types of men: One who is willing to admit the mistakes made and is looking for forgiveness and a new life; another who is not yet ready for change.
This ministry is primarily a ministry of presence. We are not there to evangelize or convert people. We are there to be a merciful, loving presence to men who have carried a cross and created crosses for others to bear, who have humiliated and been humiliated, and who have felt deserted and deserted others. Many prisoners do feel abandoned and forsaken as Christ did on the cross. They may have no support systems and few or no visitors. They may carry internal crosses that are challenging to see behind tough exteriors. Our volunteers stand at the foot of their crosses and listen to their agony some days. Other days, our volunteers need to be wise because some of these men do revile Christ and are not to be trusted. Some of these men have done horrible crimes for which they have not repented or show any remorse. Some of them will play mind games with our volunteers. I have been there. I have been conned by some of these guys. However, after a decade of doing the ministry, I believe that it is never too late to turn to Christ. The criminal who asked to be remembered in the Kingdom had only a few hours of life left. Each of these men deserves that chance.
Visiting these men in prison is not easy for many reasons, but it is the work of the kingdom and a blessing. I have seen both types of criminals. I remember one man who shot and killed his wife said he deserved to serve time. He never once took a stance of denial nor did he shift the blame elsewhere, despite being a victim of the violence of the residential schools which drove him to alcohol to block out the pain and eventually in a drunken rage he shot his wife to death. I know another who never tells that he hired someone to kill his wife. Both men deserve God’s love and mercy. Both men need to have someone show them the road to hope and forgiveness. Both men need someone to help them carry their cross until they realize that the road they walk on can offer healing. Please pray for the ministry and the inmates.
Peace,
Suzanne
Friday, March 9, 2012
Thursday, March 8, 2012
Wherever You Go
“Rabbis say that one reason that Ruth is revered is that she teaches us that God will stick with us.” ~ Sr. Bernadette at tonight’s Lenten Mission
The last night of the mission was based on the famous and beautiful reading from the Book of Ruth. Ruth will go wherever her mother-in-law will go. She cannot be alone. She must be in community. She has become interdependent. The theme of the mission has moved from independence to dependence to interdependence. Community life requires interdependence.
When we commit ourselves to community, we experience Mystery. We must learn to trust each other and the God who calls us into community. We stick together, like Ruth does with Naomi. The choice of this reading was beautiful on International Women’s Day. The presenters could have chosen a number of Scripture passages to comment on being faithful to God in community, of being woven together in relationship, but they chose one of two women on this day.
Fr. Larry suggested that that there were three ways to relate to God: pleasing, appeasing and squeezing. He gave the example of Peter not wanting to have his feet washed: were his feet too dirty or not dirty enough? What pulled him out of his comfort zone? Christ will ask much of you and He will wash your feet, your hands, your memories and anything else that is required in order for you to become the hands, feet, body, smile and gestures of Christ. We depend on God to give us gifts and God depends equally upon us to use them.
He suggested that we put our gifts together: family, friends, Church…find your gifts and don’t put your gifts on a shelf, he joked, as that would be “shelfish.” What I have been given is not just for me.
The reflection questions had to do with remembering experiences of God sticking to us. I have lots of those. In Ignatian terms these are moments of graced history. I look back over my life and see that God has been present and gracious. I am grateful for this mission. I came as a thirsty person in the desert and left happy to have gulped at the spring of water.
Peace,
Suzanne
The last night of the mission was based on the famous and beautiful reading from the Book of Ruth. Ruth will go wherever her mother-in-law will go. She cannot be alone. She must be in community. She has become interdependent. The theme of the mission has moved from independence to dependence to interdependence. Community life requires interdependence.
When we commit ourselves to community, we experience Mystery. We must learn to trust each other and the God who calls us into community. We stick together, like Ruth does with Naomi. The choice of this reading was beautiful on International Women’s Day. The presenters could have chosen a number of Scripture passages to comment on being faithful to God in community, of being woven together in relationship, but they chose one of two women on this day.
Fr. Larry suggested that that there were three ways to relate to God: pleasing, appeasing and squeezing. He gave the example of Peter not wanting to have his feet washed: were his feet too dirty or not dirty enough? What pulled him out of his comfort zone? Christ will ask much of you and He will wash your feet, your hands, your memories and anything else that is required in order for you to become the hands, feet, body, smile and gestures of Christ. We depend on God to give us gifts and God depends equally upon us to use them.
He suggested that we put our gifts together: family, friends, Church…find your gifts and don’t put your gifts on a shelf, he joked, as that would be “shelfish.” What I have been given is not just for me.
The reflection questions had to do with remembering experiences of God sticking to us. I have lots of those. In Ignatian terms these are moments of graced history. I look back over my life and see that God has been present and gracious. I am grateful for this mission. I came as a thirsty person in the desert and left happy to have gulped at the spring of water.
Peace,
Suzanne
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
In the Potter's Hands
Night two of our annual parish Lenten Mission had the reading from Jeremiah about the clay and Potter. Clay has a beauty of its own. It can be shaped and formed and yet is its own substance. Clay can fall apart and be reshaped. Clay can resist it is not passive. God can and does recreate us in the midst of trials.
Bernadette talked about Jacob wrestling with God and planted the thought that some think he was really wrestling with his own identity and God named it Israel. Now Jacob is no longer a phony Esau or ashamed of who he is. Now God gives him a title and he can live fully into who he is as a leader. Later Fr. Larry would challenge us with a litany of questions about who names us, why do we allow that, what negative names are we known by, etc. He used his own example of being defined as a man who is blind rather than a blind man. Do we define ourselves by adjectives? He also asked what name does Jesus give you. I have to contemplate that one a wee bit and see but I do hear the echo from the story, The Tree That Survived the Winter: I am called Faithful.
Using the lilies of the field Scripture reference, Fr. Larry suggested that it is not always easy to depend on God. He encouraged us to reach for things that help you be who you are, letting your name as Child of God slowly be revealed to you. Jesus alone gives you a name that you can really live with and not hide from.
Bernadette added that Jesus met people where they would rather not be met—citing characters like Zacchaeus and the Samaritan woman. He named them and then he sent them. How many times has Jesus met you in a place where you would rather not be seen? I can think of a number of times this has happened to me.
I had a funny experience during the reflection questions. In the first one, I was to picture myself as how I respond to the Potter’s hands at this point in my life. I kept self-imploding. The Potter would begin to create a vessel and then it would collapse. This happened several times. It could be because of my own weariness that I could not sustain my shape but upon reflection it felt more like a refusal to be the vessel that God was trying to create. The next reflection question was regarding praying with the value that God has given me. As I closed my eyes to contemplate this, an image came to me of a magnificently shaped pot—the one from the first question that I refused to become. I must admit that its beauty took my breath away. Something inside of me longs to be that creation.
Before the closing ritual, Fr. Larry asked who have you helped God to create. I thought of a conversation earlier that day with someone when I talked about the number of people who have helped to shape me in this parish and spoke of the number of people who I have helped to use their gifts there because of my own experience of being welcomed and called. I felt affirmed as a co-creator.
The ritual tonight had to do with lighting a candle—I suppose to illustrate dependency, as seen in tonight’s quote. We were to light our taper candles and say aloud, “ Let me be filled with your Light and shine.” I do want to be filled with the Light of God and shine brightly for all to see. As my flame feels slightly diminished, I pray that it can be fanned into a light that attracts many to the one Light who conquers the darkness.
Peace,
Suzanne
Tuesday, March 6, 2012
Reckless!
“Incompleteness is a blessing, a human blessing, a reality that allows us to reach beyond what we have to the Giver.” -Larry Gillick, sj
Tonight was our parish Lenten mission, led by my friend Sr. Bernadette O’Reilly and her friend, Fr. Larry Gillick who is a blind Jesuit working out of Creighton College and does amazing work with the Spiritual Exercises. I have been looking forward to this like a person in a desert waits to stumble upon a spring of water. I was not disappointed.
Larry opened up after a bit of humour with the desire to have “give-ups” or “want-to-dos” during Lent. He suggested that maybe we should give up picking on ourselves. The theme developed a little into thinking about entitlement and independence. The North America culture values independence to the point that we forget we depend on God. We believe that we can become so independent and strong that we no longer understand we need and have a Saviour.
Bernadette told a story of how when she was going on a retreat that a friend suggested that she pray about how she had been so reckless with her spirit and then her director told her during the retreat that she had squandered her inheritance. Ouch!! That rang true for me. I am pretty much exhausted right now and have told my friend in Singapore that I will probably spend the first two days sleeping by her pool so not to worry about entertaining me. I am tired physically and emotionally.
She said most of us in the Prodigal Son story are not that son (most of us do not have the courage to be that bad) or the father (we are not capable of that much generosity); we are the older son who has a sense of entitlement. Entitlement is the sin of our North American culture. We lose sight of the sense that our life is a gift and gratitude fights against entitlement. We must live gratefully. Larry says that we become reckless when we develop a sense of entitlement.
I am feeling reckless right now. I had jokingly said that I was giving up going to bed late during Lent but if you look at the hour of this posting you will see I am failing miserably at that tonight. I am going to return to the mission tomorrow and see what other precious information I can glean.
I had a couple of profound moments at the end of the retreat. We closed with a ritual of clenching our fists and then opening them during a song, Be Still and Know. I could not open my hands—I did not want to let go of what I am clinging to. Very telling! It actually surprised me greatly. The other incident was a conversation with someone I have been meaning to have since Christmas Eve. I found that too very revealing. I pry open my hands and promise myself I will return tomorrow.
Peace,
Suzanne
Tonight was our parish Lenten mission, led by my friend Sr. Bernadette O’Reilly and her friend, Fr. Larry Gillick who is a blind Jesuit working out of Creighton College and does amazing work with the Spiritual Exercises. I have been looking forward to this like a person in a desert waits to stumble upon a spring of water. I was not disappointed.
Larry opened up after a bit of humour with the desire to have “give-ups” or “want-to-dos” during Lent. He suggested that maybe we should give up picking on ourselves. The theme developed a little into thinking about entitlement and independence. The North America culture values independence to the point that we forget we depend on God. We believe that we can become so independent and strong that we no longer understand we need and have a Saviour.
Bernadette told a story of how when she was going on a retreat that a friend suggested that she pray about how she had been so reckless with her spirit and then her director told her during the retreat that she had squandered her inheritance. Ouch!! That rang true for me. I am pretty much exhausted right now and have told my friend in Singapore that I will probably spend the first two days sleeping by her pool so not to worry about entertaining me. I am tired physically and emotionally.
She said most of us in the Prodigal Son story are not that son (most of us do not have the courage to be that bad) or the father (we are not capable of that much generosity); we are the older son who has a sense of entitlement. Entitlement is the sin of our North American culture. We lose sight of the sense that our life is a gift and gratitude fights against entitlement. We must live gratefully. Larry says that we become reckless when we develop a sense of entitlement.
I am feeling reckless right now. I had jokingly said that I was giving up going to bed late during Lent but if you look at the hour of this posting you will see I am failing miserably at that tonight. I am going to return to the mission tomorrow and see what other precious information I can glean.
I had a couple of profound moments at the end of the retreat. We closed with a ritual of clenching our fists and then opening them during a song, Be Still and Know. I could not open my hands—I did not want to let go of what I am clinging to. Very telling! It actually surprised me greatly. The other incident was a conversation with someone I have been meaning to have since Christmas Eve. I found that too very revealing. I pry open my hands and promise myself I will return tomorrow.
Peace,
Suzanne
Sunday, March 4, 2012
What is Your Isaac?
“God said, ‘Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love, and go to the land of Moriah and offer him there as a burnt offering on one of the mountains that I will show you.’” ~ Genesis 22:2
The daily readings were difficult ones today. Most of us do not understand the test God lays before Abraham. Why would a loving God request that a father sacrifice his only son after promising that his descendents would number more than the sand on the shore or the stars in the sky? The kind of God who would sacrifice an only Son would make such a request.
Those of us who claim to put God first in our lives oftentimes have a whole host of things on a list that puts God second, third, twentieth—a loved one, a career, stability, health, pride, stubbornness, loneliness, addictions, fears all win out over God most days. We know that God will forgive us and keep us in a grasp from which we cannot wiggle out and so we are not put to the test most days.
The second reading says that nothing will keep us from the love of the Christ: no hardship, no distress, no famine. Christ will still love us but will we still love Christ when these perils come? In the Gospel of the Transfiguration, we see that the disciples want to make God first in their lives having seen what happened to Jesus. They will build tents and live on the mountaintop forever at that moment.
Most of us cannot sustain the mountaintop moment. I have many Isaacs in my life—more than I am willing to admit. I realize this when I figure out how unbalanced my life has become. When I cannot find time to pray, when I lose the desire to go to mass, when I am too tired to think straight, I have gone too far and too long without God. I need to dump my pride, my ambition, my desires, and my needs on an altar and pull out the knife.
I know that in that moment God will intervene because God knows that my desire is to serve God even if I am off track or overwhelmed and tempted by the world. I used to spend much more time on mountaintops. I got very comfortable in my pews for several years with a pastor who kept me fed more than I acknowledged. There was no need to go elsewhere. I am hoping that while I am on vacation that I may find my centre again and return home at peace.
In the Spiritual Exercises, we pray this prayer and the grace to live it out:
Take, Lord, and Receive
Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory,
my understanding, and my entire will.
All I have and call my own.
Whatever I have or hold, you have given me.
I return it all to you and surrender it wholly
to be governed by your will.
Give me only your love and your grace
and I am rich enough and ask for nothing more.
What about you, who or what is your Isaac and how does it set you off the right path?
Peace,
Suzanne
The daily readings were difficult ones today. Most of us do not understand the test God lays before Abraham. Why would a loving God request that a father sacrifice his only son after promising that his descendents would number more than the sand on the shore or the stars in the sky? The kind of God who would sacrifice an only Son would make such a request.
Those of us who claim to put God first in our lives oftentimes have a whole host of things on a list that puts God second, third, twentieth—a loved one, a career, stability, health, pride, stubbornness, loneliness, addictions, fears all win out over God most days. We know that God will forgive us and keep us in a grasp from which we cannot wiggle out and so we are not put to the test most days.
The second reading says that nothing will keep us from the love of the Christ: no hardship, no distress, no famine. Christ will still love us but will we still love Christ when these perils come? In the Gospel of the Transfiguration, we see that the disciples want to make God first in their lives having seen what happened to Jesus. They will build tents and live on the mountaintop forever at that moment.
Most of us cannot sustain the mountaintop moment. I have many Isaacs in my life—more than I am willing to admit. I realize this when I figure out how unbalanced my life has become. When I cannot find time to pray, when I lose the desire to go to mass, when I am too tired to think straight, I have gone too far and too long without God. I need to dump my pride, my ambition, my desires, and my needs on an altar and pull out the knife.
I know that in that moment God will intervene because God knows that my desire is to serve God even if I am off track or overwhelmed and tempted by the world. I used to spend much more time on mountaintops. I got very comfortable in my pews for several years with a pastor who kept me fed more than I acknowledged. There was no need to go elsewhere. I am hoping that while I am on vacation that I may find my centre again and return home at peace.
In the Spiritual Exercises, we pray this prayer and the grace to live it out:
Take, Lord, and Receive
Take, Lord, and receive all my liberty, my memory,
my understanding, and my entire will.
All I have and call my own.
Whatever I have or hold, you have given me.
I return it all to you and surrender it wholly
to be governed by your will.
Give me only your love and your grace
and I am rich enough and ask for nothing more.
What about you, who or what is your Isaac and how does it set you off the right path?
Peace,
Suzanne
Saturday, March 3, 2012
The Enemy is Within
“But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.” ~ Matthew 5:44
This is one of those challenging statements that Jesus places before us. Some people like Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., and others lived this out so I know it is possible. This Lent I have been praying for my “enemies” and I have noticed a softening. The Spirit is a’ moving!
Today though I could not help but feel a deep sadness when visiting a friend at a hospice. As we chatted, I could see when there were moments of clarity and when there were moments of confusion. What do you do when the enemy is yourself? I realize she was not totally of aware of her confusion but still when she was I could see the emotional pain. I carefully steered her away from minefields, handed her a tissue when tears came, changed the topic and brought back a smile to her face, and responded to the same concerns a few times knowing full well that she had no recollection of having the conversation a few moments earlier.
I smiled as she introduced me to the worker as “an old friend” but nodded because we have known each other half of my life. I met her 25 years ago. When she named the former spouses of her children as current, I gently inserted the correct name into my response and she did not react. When she insisted that her daughter and first husband had moved into the basement suite of the hospice, I mentioned that it was wonderful that her children could spend so much time with her. When she said that no one from our parish but one of the priests had been by to visit, I pulled out the guest book and watched her forget her loneliness by reading the names of those who had been by in the six days in which she had moved into her new surroundings. I signed in so that people would let her know that I too had stopped by and left her watching the men’s curling game.
What will aging look like for me? Will I be like Gram who had her mind clear but her body limited or more like her siblings who for the most part were confused like my old friend? I watch my parents struggle with so many aches and pains and know that the potential for the enemy being within is strong. As the Gospel reading continues, we learn that God makes his sun to rise on the evil and on the good. How you live your life is not a guarantee that the end days will be easy. My friend served the church for most of her life. I brought her the Eucharist this afternoon and her eyes lit up when I asked if she would like to receive it. She even read the parts in the book that I should have read, and I let her, smiling in her enthusiasm. In her struggles, she still has an anchor. As the psalmist sings, “Happy are those who seek God with their whole heart.”
Peace,
Suzanne
This is one of those challenging statements that Jesus places before us. Some people like Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., and others lived this out so I know it is possible. This Lent I have been praying for my “enemies” and I have noticed a softening. The Spirit is a’ moving!
Today though I could not help but feel a deep sadness when visiting a friend at a hospice. As we chatted, I could see when there were moments of clarity and when there were moments of confusion. What do you do when the enemy is yourself? I realize she was not totally of aware of her confusion but still when she was I could see the emotional pain. I carefully steered her away from minefields, handed her a tissue when tears came, changed the topic and brought back a smile to her face, and responded to the same concerns a few times knowing full well that she had no recollection of having the conversation a few moments earlier.
I smiled as she introduced me to the worker as “an old friend” but nodded because we have known each other half of my life. I met her 25 years ago. When she named the former spouses of her children as current, I gently inserted the correct name into my response and she did not react. When she insisted that her daughter and first husband had moved into the basement suite of the hospice, I mentioned that it was wonderful that her children could spend so much time with her. When she said that no one from our parish but one of the priests had been by to visit, I pulled out the guest book and watched her forget her loneliness by reading the names of those who had been by in the six days in which she had moved into her new surroundings. I signed in so that people would let her know that I too had stopped by and left her watching the men’s curling game.
What will aging look like for me? Will I be like Gram who had her mind clear but her body limited or more like her siblings who for the most part were confused like my old friend? I watch my parents struggle with so many aches and pains and know that the potential for the enemy being within is strong. As the Gospel reading continues, we learn that God makes his sun to rise on the evil and on the good. How you live your life is not a guarantee that the end days will be easy. My friend served the church for most of her life. I brought her the Eucharist this afternoon and her eyes lit up when I asked if she would like to receive it. She even read the parts in the book that I should have read, and I let her, smiling in her enthusiasm. In her struggles, she still has an anchor. As the psalmist sings, “Happy are those who seek God with their whole heart.”
Peace,
Suzanne
Friday, March 2, 2012
The Examen
"I have a lovely habit: at night in my prayers I touch everyone I have seen that day.” ~ St. Teresa of Avila
The Spiritual Exercises have brought much depth to my life. One feature that I love is the Examen. At the end of the day (usually though it can be at the beginning for the previous day), one runs through in their mind, their entire day to see where God was present and where one noticed God or not.
This lovely little quote from St. Teresa is another spin on that habit. Bless each person who you encountered that day. I might have to add that to my routine this Lent.
Peace,
Suzanne
The Spiritual Exercises have brought much depth to my life. One feature that I love is the Examen. At the end of the day (usually though it can be at the beginning for the previous day), one runs through in their mind, their entire day to see where God was present and where one noticed God or not.
This lovely little quote from St. Teresa is another spin on that habit. Bless each person who you encountered that day. I might have to add that to my routine this Lent.
Peace,
Suzanne
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